it just sucks.

For a long time, I was kinda stuck in a rut on my show. I didn't even realize it. But one day in an air-check session with my boss, he shared with me a new angle on being transparent. That presenting a problem and tying it up in a nice bow/scripture by the end of the talk break doesn't have to be the norm. Try presenting an open ended problem, UGH, and leave it there.

I think about this from the other end of the radio, or even just alone with my friends... how relatable we become when we present chaos and frustration yet rejoice even in the junk. Suddenly it becomes a little closer to being ok, less heavy. There's truly something to shining some serious Light on that darned darkness.

Take for instance my dear friend Lynn. Today she's on my show talking about her recent experiences but she's not at all like "Yadda yadda, I lost my job have two kids at home, a house note and my husband's working two jobs, but God's got it covered!"

No, she's like "Dang it, this sucks. This is really hard." And day in and day out she's moving forward, a living example that it's not all about tying it up in a nice fake bow. She believes YES, and doubt does creep in... fear sneaks in too. But she knows her source of Truth and she's on her face in prayer. Lynn is my hero for so many reasons, but mainly because she lives her life and doesn't hide the junk.

I'm excited to see how many people call, comment and encourage after I air her bit this afternoon. Purely because they've either been there at some point or are there now?

Don't hide in it anymore. It's ok to ask for help. Talk about it and live it out. Talking about junk is a scary place to be but remember in our weakest places, He is strong.

dk at work.

Check him out, details on when to watch!!

I Love Houston Tour stop #1 - Moody Gardens

Story and details to follow...

do something different.

I can't wait to marry DK, that's not obvious at all I'm sure :) I know that when our perfect day comes, it's going to be so full of unique and creative elements that represent us, our family and our friends.

I saw this today and my heart just BURST. I wish I was friends with these people and it made me all the more excited for one day when we get to break wedding molds and traditions too :)



If the video doesn't appear for you, click here for Youtube.

NASA nerd alert.

Google does it again!
Something super cool - check it out!

dk shoots the alamo.

With a CAMERA, you see :) We landed in Houston Sunday night and an hour later he was on a another plane to San Antonio to shoot a TV show (details to follow!!) From what I hear, it's next to impossible to shoot inside. And my boyfriend did. He comes home tonight!

home from mexico!

So relaxed and rested... Everyone at work has been asking "What did you do? How was it?" and all I have to offer is that I slept, read, layed out on the beach and floated in the pool. Nice.

great photographers think alike.

Cody shot this photo of DK months ago.

And this is Mat Kearney's current Facebook profile pic. Haha!

adios!

Byebye! I'm going on vacation tomorrow morning through Sunday with DK and a bunch of our good friends!

I plan on finding a chair on the beach under an umbrella, reading my book and Real Simple magazines cover to cover, writing pages and pages, swimming, taking romantic walks on the beach with DK, and creating awesome memories with friends. OH! Photos too :)
Love you!

accurate?

I was stalking Carson on Facebook today and he had this on his page so I stole it. HAHAHA!

what a difference a month can make!

so nervous I went blind.

God has a hilarious sense of humor. I'm so glad He's not mean though, cause I figure He's trying to teach me something when He so often pulls me out of my comfort zone. And my comfort zone is 100% behind the scenes, oh lordy.

I mentioned before that I very much dislike speaking in public. I get so anxious and worked up in the days leading up to an event, concert or speaking engagement and no matter now many times I've done this, I still get incredibly nervous. My hands shake, my knees go weak, my eyes dart around the room looking for any potential escape route. Once I get into my groove though, things are awesome. And afterwards, my greatest satisfaction comes from knowing I did it not for my glory, but for His. (Otherwise I beat myself up for being such a dork.)

But this morning was probably the worst ever. I was asked to represent KSBJ at a press conference held at an elementary school for the upcoming Operation Backpack - we are a media sponsor helping with the YMCA's efforts to outfit 38,000 children with back packs and school supplies this year. Nikki Sparks our Marketing Director says "Talk for 2 minutes, easy as pie." Alright, ok, I can do this.

We arrived, met amazing people and after mingling, those representing sponsors were seated behind a podium, in front of reporters and news cameras. I felt great! And all I had to remember was to follow Constable Victor Trevino. As he finished a magnificent talk, I stood and made my way to the podium. (Why on EARTH did I wear heels?!) I stood before everyone and said "Good morning!" That's when I truly cursed the decision to wear heels because the podium mic wasn't able to adjust to my great heights and I had to stand holding it. Perfect for shakey hand girl, let me tell you. After this hurdle, I began speaking but lost my train of great talking points. Scrambling to recover, I look up at the cameras and that's when it happened. My back was sweating (sorry for the TMI), my knees about to give out, searching for the simple words to promote the great efforts for kids in need and suddenly my vision blurred and then... I couldn't see.

I kept talking as my vision slightly returned. I spoke from the heart and in my head kept saying "Speak what you know, you can do this! Just get through this!" My heart was racing and I was so afraid of letting everyone down!! Eventually, somehow I wrapped it up, closed graciously and said "Thank you." And everyone clapped. I smiled huge and felt my way back to my seat. I have absolutely no idea what I'd just said.

But here's what I think, now that I've recovered. 1. We are our own worst critics. 2. Laughing at yourself is ok. 3. Moving out of your comfort zones is a great place to be because in our weakest places, God is strong. 4. Fear is not of God and you-know-who wants to use it to keep you from doing great things. 5. I always say "I'm never doing that again!" but who I am to get in the way of the big picture?

I'm laughing so hard right now, haha...

the meaning of life.

When I was a little girl, I would daydream about being 25 years old and having it all figured out. To me, having it all figured out meant being involved in healthy relationships and handling conflict powerfully. Money would come easily and in my wallet, I'd consistently have so many ones, this many fives, tens and of course, twenties. I'd be at the apex of my career and be climbing higher, in a creative environment that in some way helped a lot of people. And 25 was it, I'd have it all figured out. I sat in my room as a kid and made these lists, no joke.

From time to time, I like to revert back to 10 year old Liz, check in and see how she'd think I'm doing. Last week, DK and I were taking a walk with the dogs, not talking much when I asked him "What do YOU think the meaning of life is?" We chatted back and forth with obvious answers and since then I've been thinking more about it. So much so, I talked about it on the show yesterday to see what you think.

For me, it's become about big picture thinking. Focusing on the trivial pieces of life are important in ways, yes but lately I've felt my perspective widening and generalizing in a way that just lets stuff go easier, isn't offended as easily, and relaxes in the understanding of who I have to answer to in the end. Concerning my career and the big money, I know that for a season I'm where God wants me to be. Some days I love it, other days I wrestle with God and why on earth I have to do this every day (see forthcoming blog titled "so nervous I went blind".) Thing is, I never saw myself here and I can't imagine being anywhere else. I figure I'm just along for the ride?!

And I think big picture thinking helps with the specifics. Loving others first and serving God. Pretty simple. And all this, coming from a truly complicated and "but what if" questioning girl! Aha!

Yesterday I was floored with your response, your honesty, wisdom and transparency. I heard from a girl who's turning 28 on the 28th of this month, is scared to death because she is nowhere near where she thought she'd be by now. 2 minutes later a 50 year woman calls and says "I feared the same thing as I turned 28 on July 28th many years ago, but this ride has been full of many unexpected adventures, my life so full of joy! Please tell the last caller she's going to be ok." (I love working at KSBJ).

And today I'm still receiving emails concerning the meaning of life and "where we thought we'd be by now". Today Chelsea wrote and said: "I have everything I expected. I am 24. I graduated from college, married when I was 22, have a job, bought a house when I was 23, have a wonderful Godly husband. I am truly, truly blessed. However, even though I am where I expected to be, it's still now WHAT I thought it would be. I thought it would be perfect. And easy. I thought I'd have a clean home, make great money, have fun hobbies, etc. Not true! I constantly struggle with wanting something more... wanting to be in the next stage. This STUFF means nothing. My place in life means nothing. I'm slowly learning not to hold myself up to the world's standards. What it all comes down to is this: Is my life glorifying God? If it's not, it's just stuff... and I'm just a resounding gong."

I love it. I love the conversation and what it's stirred up in my heart. What are your thoughts?

fireworks.

I was sitting next to DK, his arm around me, waiting for fireworks to begin over downtown when I noticed this incredible excitement welling up within me. I felt so inspired, started writing this in my head and wanted to get down in detail why fireworks impact me so much. They're captivating, completely stunning and leave you in a state of awe and wonder. Frozen for those moments in time, we tilt our view towards the sky as the light and bursts of color dance across our face, the boom and blasts startling yet totally exhilarating! Fireworks are not just powerful in their boom and blast, but also in their ability to halt a busy crowd, completely drawing attention away from everything else.

And I always seem to remember where I was anytime I've been entranced by a fireworks spectacle. Several 4th of July holidays as kids in Detroit, watching fireworks over Lake St. Claire, snuggled together under blankets. One year I was under an umbrella with mom and Andrew while it rained - those were the loudest booms ever, bouncing off such a low cloud cover! Oh and one year, Andrew and I biked up the unfinished overpass to Woodlands Parkway, higher than anyone else around. That was quite a view, I know I have pictures somewhere. And wow... I always think about the one 4th of July we almost lost my dad. David and Kim drove behind the ambulance, passing fireworks all the way to the medical center - The Woodlands, off 1960 and also downtown... what bizarre and eerie timing.

But the show is always over before I realize it, the grand finale of powpowpowboompowboom! one after the other hitting just when I thought they were getting started. I always close my eyes for a moment and breathe a prayer for those who serve our country, in any branch of military. I have no idea what it is to do what they do or even what it feels like have a brother, dad or cousin serving... but I am so grateful. I'm so grateful for what they do to protect my freedom. That's a powerful element of a fireworks show, remembering those that serve and have served, hoooah!

And yet there's something so romantic about fireworks, they inspire contemplation of settled contentedness and warmth, stirring desire (and hope for the future) for the closeness of a "significant" viewing partner. Haha, I always dreamed about a man I could hold hands with while watching fireworks, I always tried to plan it just so. But despite my faultless plans, it never ever happened until last summer with DK. It was truly my favorite 4th ever... on bikes with Dave, Kim, DK and a couple others, zooming through downtown, laying on the side of the bayou on our backs watching the fireworks literally above us, great food, great energy. Holding hands. With my love! Best ever. And this year we made no attempt to top it :) Ya just can't!

However, we did walk from DK's with the dogs to UH downtown campus and sat on the back patio, together, looking out over the skyline, watching fireworks. And I had to catch my breath a couple times... such a perfect setting! I really couldn't have planned it better myself :)

DK's Amazing Photos.

"make your own creative space."

Ma Olden is one of the most amazing women I've ever known and she continues to bless and encourage me with her wisdom and example through and through. Ma is my sister-in-law Kim's mother and she's been so generous sharing her with me :)

DK and I try to make the drive out to north Houston to spend time with Ma and Pa as often as possible and last March during a visit, Ma shared some advice that really struck me. I thought you might really benefit from this as well, hence the blog.

After visiting with the men for a while, Ma took me on a little tour around the house of all the projects she's working on. She showed me the quilt she's sewing by hand for one of her sons and as she carefully pointed out the detail, she tells me "with each stitch, I say a prayer for him"... I was stunned. Imagine the love and prayer that completely saturates that quilt!

She then led me upstairs to show how Kim's old room now also serves as her private sewing room where she can spread out her currect projects, a couple of which are for girls less fortunate.

She went on to share how important it is as women that we have our own little nook, a place to spread out and maintain our creative endeavors. "A lot of women use the kitchen table. But what happens when its time for dinner? You have to move your projects to another area and it disrupts your creative flow... other things get in the way. It is so important that, even if just a little quiet closet, you find a space to be YOU and talk to God and be creative continually." She told me she gave this advice to Kim as well and was elated to learn that at Dave and Kim's new flat in KL, Kim is able to spread out and paint freely! It makes absolute sense.

So, last Monday night DK helped set me up for a space next to my books and in front of a window that I can write, sew, plan and create all the ideas and projects that have been bottled up for so long... because I didn't have a set space to do it! I woke up the next morning and sat at my desk looking out over the front yard, Kenai at my side, wow so refreshing. I wrote and wrote and wrote some more. Next, I'm setting up my sewing machine to make the curtains I've been thinking about for ages now.
Thanks Ma :)