Tuesday, March 3, 2009

the opposite of reality tv.

I'm writing a letter to the producers of The Bachelor tv series to suggest either a show category change or an alternative name to this show. "Unrealistic Romance" was one idea that came to mind, "The Degradation of Modern Marriages" was another one I've been mulling over or "A Mockery of Morals and Values" kinda has en edgy feel to it... don't ya think?

If you've never watched, it's the truest train wreck of a tv show. I swear I'm not going to watch anymore and then find myself fast forwarding through commercials like a bat out of you-know-where to continue watching the most pathetic yet glamorous set up of just another failed relationship. Train. Wreck.

I only started watching with 3 episodes left in the season and figure I missed out on most of the make out sessions, drama between girls, and Jason telling each poor contestant that while he "really felt a connection" with her, he just doesn't see her as his wife or his son's mother. Oh puh-leeeeze.

But beneath all my ranting and yelling at the tv/Jason, I feel sorry for the people involved. I really do believe they enter this show hoping for a chance at love, for a change of scenery... and no doubt a false sense of short-lived fame. But why put them through this? Why create an opportunity for change... for the worst?

I'm not gonna lie, I know without a doubt that after stepping out of a limo dressed in a gorgeous gown and entering into a whirlwind of adrenalin filled, over the top romantic and otherwise unaffordable dates with some hot guy I watched and grew to love on a previous season of The Bachelorette, I could possibly fall for the guy too. I guarantee though that 80% of the adrenalin would be my competitive spirit rising up within me, wanting to prove that I'm more sincere, more real, more in-love and more capable of winning that man's heart. Couple those elements with tv cameras and lights in your face 24/7? Jeeze Louise.

So then what about After The Final Rose? Jason breaks Melissa's heart and fakes emotion through the whole breakup on national television. And while Chris whats-his-face is sitting right there, furrowing his brow and feigning sincerity?! (I think that's what he was going for anyway, I'm not sure.) Melissa had a great argument and fought well. But apparently Jason was incapable of controlling his head AND his heart and couldn't get Molly off his mind... and then let Melissa go. It was just too easy!

But despite all the gossip chats that reveal Molly and Jason have been going out since before Christmas and the Melissa breakup scene was an act, the whole thing is absolutely whack and bottom line is not God's best for this covenant and committment founded in God-willed marriages. I'm out of breath...

What is this teaching us, much less our children? I won't even go into concerns about unwanted pregnancies and current divorce rates - both results of painful choices, possibly mislead ideas of passionate love and in some cases a lack of knowing how to work through things. For some people, giving up is just an easy option. If we all had the opportunity to hop from hot tub make-out sessions to overnights in a tent with a hot guy for the rest of our lives, maybe love would last forever and come a little easier. But it's just not realistic.

I think The Bachelor/ette series would be FAR more interesting if at least the couples in question were given an opportunity to experience real life adventures together. Imagine the endless possibilities and OHH the real life drama that would spring from these episodes!

"On next week's The Bachelor... Jillian cooks a meal for Jason's boss and co-workers in their home together!" Or, "When The Bachelor returns, Jason caught a bug and is puking his guts out - stay tuned to see how Molly handles the situation and takes care of him..."

Finances, road trips together, talk some politics, discuss religion, do something creative together, clean a messy house, hang out with each other's friends, ATLEAST play 20 questions and know the other's favorite candy or color.

I realize I can't stop a fast moving train (wreck) and am not really going to write a letter to the producers. I will however do my part to be real and true in my relationship with DK and be grateful for and utilize for the married couples and tools around us to help continue building this strength in love. Aaaaand, smootching in the hot tub doesn't sound half bad either :)


Stacey said...

amen sista! i am dissapointed. who knows if it was all jason or abc. either way, it's shady. grr. i won't watch again (have i said that before? yes.)

Yannochka said...

Great rant Liz! Took the words out of my mouth.

I stopped watching the Bachelor/ette after Trista and Ryan got married ( who by the way, as far as I know, are the ONLY two who really fell in love, got married and now have a son).

it's all drama on that show, they should have stopped the show after about the 5th season because I think after seeing how NONE of the Bach's got married, girls should know better. But that's just me.


Vivian said...

I totally agree with you, Liz. It is almost as if nothing is sacred anymore. I can't understand how anyone can think that by going on a show and having 25 people randomly picked for you..that "the one" that God has in store for you will just be in that group. That is why so many of these relationships have not worked because while you might be able to find the one that is most compatible for you in the 25, that does not necessarily mean that that person is the one. Its such a same that ABC stooped to such a low as to broadcast a very painful breakup all in the name of ratings. Its a shame.

Keri said...

Can I borrow that soap box from you? I was "Amen-ing" through the whole post. I am completely disgusted by the whole thing. I even watched After The Final Rose 2 tonight thinking MAYBE there would be something redeeming about all that happened.

There wasn't. Jason even had the nerve to say that he would hope his son would someday see that he followed his heart and did it with integrity.

Obviously, his definition of integrity and mine differ greatly.

Love the post!

Gerson Barrera said...

hey liz..

i saw the whole season. i was just ashamed of how low it wentt. first of all.. breaking up with your girlfriend on national television and minutes after kissing the other girl its just awful. not only that... i cant believe how many ppl are okay the situation and saying. "aww he followed his heart" okay, follow your heart but think about the other person, don't you think its humiliating what you've done... thats when i tell myself.. man are we in trouble. one last thing.

bloggerdogg said...

A certain rapper summed it up best, "It's all about the Benjamins." That's what the alpahbet network(ABC) is all about when it comes to the Bachelor/Bachelorette. People watch, ratings climb. Ratings climb=more money for the network, advertisers, and stations that carry this program. Sooner or later, this will come to an end. That's my take. Out.

Hannah said...


That was beautifully put - Every single word!

SpeechlessLaura said...

Love your post, Liz! The after the final rose was actually the only episode I watched this season, after having watched Jason be the "runner up" last "Bachelorette". I totally agree about the defacing the sacredness of marriage... I have many issues with the show and how much worse it gets every season. Yet every time, I find myself drawn to tune in every now and then and see if any actual "spark" happens between two people. It's sad what the world is watching and how so many people are getting their hearts and lives broken because of this show, and so many are unaware of the True Love that can only come from the God that created them.

Hopefully this show will come to an end soon enough.